18, Washington State, my name is Dan but most people just call me Dan, I'M STRAIGHT, and I make music and work out, with blogging on the side. Snapchat: chewchewchrain
Pls follow/reblog my selfies.
A woman who doesn’t work here anymore brought this weird smurf toy into work a couple of months ago and set it on top of the computer because apparently her kids wouldn’t stop fighting over it and I hate it every day. It sits up there taunting me with its apparent lack of spine or any normal smurf anatomy. Anyway I found out a few weeks ago her kids are about 15-17 and now I’m certain this is a highly cursed object.
abc news broke their website and i cant stop laughing holy shit call 911
the time has arrived
kill the imposter
i could use a good laugh
notice: this year’s extreme yodeling competition has been postponed until further notice.
my time has come
lets blow this joint
AND FUCK SHIT UP
Chat reblogged from with 1,925 notes
So I found this harlequin romance paperback today, and normally I just toss those right over without paying them much mind, but the cover of this one made me pause. Sure that the artist was just taking liberties, I checked out the back.
I’m dubious. I should read a passage:
It is a literal bear.
Okay yeah I’ll admit it I’m going to read this but only because it sounds like the most fucked up romance novel in existence.
You have some explaining to do, Canada.
You guys don’t understand. Screw it being a bestseller, 50 Shades of Gray is a bestseller, this book won the Governor General’s Award. That’s the highest literary award in Canada. That’s the pulitzer prize of Canadian literature. Bear is a part of Canadian literary history.
i had to read this book in uni for my first year Canadian literature class. When we first heard of it we were like, “Oh the Bear’s a metaphor or some shit.” but then one kid read ahead, and was like, “Guys, no, she literally fucks the bear. She fucked a bear.”
You mean to tell me this is the Great Canadian Novel?
going to the bathroom in those must be annoying
fucking how? they have a button and a zipper just like most other pants
unless you pee out of your foot
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